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I think I got a bruise from landing on you. I hear bacon is real good for healing a bruise.
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Good
Think
Bruise
Thinking
Bruises
Bacon
Landing
Healing
Hear
Real
More quotes by Janet Evanovich
I thought you wanted to date other women? I didn't want to date other women. We decided in the heat of the moment that were no longer exclusively attached. And I could date other men. Morelli was starting to look annoyed. Have you been dating other men? Maybe. As long as it isn't Ranger, Morelli said. I don't think Ranger d
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Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.
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The golden years are for pussies. We went straight to brass.
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Omygod, I haven’t got years. I’ll have to hide in the Bat Cave.” “Once you go to the Bat Cave it’s forever, babe.” Eeek.
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I almost never shoot people.
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He doesn’t look very smart,” Diesel said. “He’s not even giving me the finger.” “Can monkey’s do that?” Hal asked. Carl gave him the finger. “Cool!” Hal said.
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You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms. Joe Morelli
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Are you afraid of me? Uh... yes.' The smile stayed fixed in place. 'You should be. You locked me in a refrigerator truck with three dead people. Sooner or later I'm going to get you for it.
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I'd kiss you, but you smell like a gym bag.
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Thinking very often resembles napping, but the intent is different. --Stephanie Plum
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I could use some help with an FTA. What's your problem? He's old, and I'll look like a loser if I shoot him.
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You should see me work my magic in leather Ranger
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Diesel is back, Ranger said. Yes. How did you know? I woke up with a migraine this morning. Ranger said.
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I'd slept with Ranger! Not sexually, of course. But I'd been in his bed. And then there was the evil shower gel. It was all because of the shower gel, I said. Morelli's eyes narrowed. Shower gel? I made a major effort not to sigh. Long story. You probably don't want to hear it.
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You're not looking for a partner, Ranger said. You're looking for an enforcer. You hate to run. You must be worried about getting into that black dress. What did you eat just now? Piece of cake? Candy bar? Everything, I said. I just ate everything.
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These are desparate times. - Stephanie Plum
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I looked over at him. Is that a proposal? There was total silence for a couple beats. I'm not sure. It just popped out. Let me know when you're sure. Would you say yes? Morelli asked. I'm not sure.
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I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying.
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they have enough testosterone between them, if testosterone were electricity they could light up New York City for the month of August
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Ranger sent us to check on you, Hal said. We just got here, and we heard shots. Some moron ate my jelly doughnut, Lula said. So I shot him.
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