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I rushed us out of your parents' house because I didn't think I could manage two hours at the dinner table with everyone focused on Joe Loosey's joystick sitting in the refrigerator next to the applesauce.
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Didn
Dinner
Two
Sitting
Refrigerator
Think
Parents
Rushed
Thinking
Parent
Refrigerators
Hours
Table
Everyone
Manage
House
Tables
Next
Focused
More quotes by Janet Evanovich
Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet.
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There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls.
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Give me the gun. Ranger said. I extracted the gun from my pants and handed it over. Ranger held the gun in the pulm of his hand and smiled. It's warm, he said. He put the gun in the glove compartment and plugged the key into the ignition. Am I fired? No. Any women who can heat up a gun like that is worth keeping around.
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Opening my door to Dillon Ruddick, my bulding super. I handed him a cup of coffee. Sorry about the blood. What was it this time? No one reported gunfire. I hit a guy in the face with a hair dryer. Whoa. Dillon said. It wasn't my fault, I told him. Maybe we should lay down some linoleum here. It would make things easier for
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Maybe your pregnant. Oops, hold on, you're not pregnant, on account of you're not gettin any.
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He doesn’t look very smart,” Diesel said. “He’s not even giving me the finger.” “Can monkey’s do that?” Hal asked. Carl gave him the finger. “Cool!” Hal said.
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I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.
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I'm sorry about your Porsche. I can replace the Porsche. I can't replace you. You need to be more careful. I was just sitting in your car! Babe, you're a magnet for disaster.
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What are you doing back at the bakery?” I asked [Diesel]. “Did you know Wulf was here?” “No. I knew food was here.
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As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper.
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She doesn’t know,” Cate said. “Kellen is a secret. I didn’t think my mother would approve.” “Why wouldn’t your mother approve?” Pugg asked. “It’s my job,” Kellen said. “I kill people. It pays well, but it’s not universally socially acceptable.
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How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.
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I felt my cell phone buzz, and I looked at the screen. Ranger. “Your GPS just went blank,” Ranger said when I answered. “The car exploded.” There was a beat of silence. “Rafael won the pool,” Ranger said. “Are you okay?” “Yes.” “I’ll send someone.
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I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up and strangle my grandmother.
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Looks like you're on a roll. This is the second car you've toasted this week. Carl Costanza - Hot Six
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Almost everybody I know has died,” Grandma said. “Bunch of wimps.
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The note wasn't signed, but I could tell it was from Morelli by the way my nipples got hard.
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Men are like shoes. Some fit better than others. And sometimes you go out shopping and there's nothing you like. And then, as luck would have it, the next week you find two that are perfect, but you don't have the money to buy both.-
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I want to be there when you get Cubbin. And I don’t want to be left out of the television show either. Little people are sexy now. Have you seen Game of Thrones? We’re hot.
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I failed math twice, never fully grasping probability theory. I mean, first off, who cares if you pick a black ball or a white ball out of the bag? And second, if you’re bent over about the color, don’t leave it to chance. Look in the damn bag and pick the color you want.
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