Quote

Opening my door to Dillon Ruddick, my bulding super. I handed him a cup of coffee. Sorry about the blood. What was it this time? No one reported gunfire. I hit a guy in the face with a hair dryer. Whoa. Dillon said. It wasn't my fault, I told him. Maybe we should lay down some linoleum here. It would make things easier for

Janet Evanovich

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Time
Blood
Sorry
Handed
Maybe
Door
Fault
Guy
Clean
Cups
Linoleum
Face
Doors
Super
Gunfire
Faces
Easier
Lays
Dryer
Make
Hair
Coffee
Dryers
Things
Told
Opening
Whoa
Would
Wasn
Faults
Reported

More quotes by Janet Evanovich

Image
You could be the Mega Mage of wizards. You could rule Minionfire. Do you really think so?' Yeah, but you'd have to make a deal with the wood elves.' I don't like the wood elves.' They're okay. They're misunderstood.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I checked my phone messages. Three in all. The first was from Joe. “Hey, Cupcake.” That was it. That was the whole message. The second was from Ranger. “Yo.” Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox.
Janet Evanovich
Image
When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroom at school.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I always know it's Sunday because I wake up feeling apologetic. That's one of the cool things about being a Catholic . . . it's a multifaceted experience. If you lose the faith, chances are you'll keep the guilt, so it isn't as if you've been skunked altogether.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Are you afraid of me? Uh... yes.' The smile stayed fixed in place. 'You should be. You locked me in a refrigerator truck with three dead people. Sooner or later I'm going to get you for it.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I stuck my tongue out at him because I was feeling exceptionall mature.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Maybe your pregnant. Oops, hold on, you're not pregnant, on account of you're not gettin any.
Janet Evanovich
Image
He squinted at me. What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?
Janet Evanovich
Image
I don't know much about cars, Joyce said, but I think someone took my engine.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Howie's doctor told him to lose ten pounds, and since Howie's been on a diet he's gained three.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Turns out, that's how it is with weddings. You just keep getting in deeper and deeper until you want to throw up.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off, he said. I'm not in the mood to compromise.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I don't mean to change the subject or anything, but have you tried concealer on that zit? Cynthia Lotte - Hot Six
Janet Evanovich
Image
Suppose I lay down on the pavement and you run over me a few times with my own car...just for old times.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Suppose something goes wrong? Suppose you need a big full-figure woman like me to help straighten things out? Lula
Janet Evanovich
Image
Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I had an alarm, I had nerve gas, I had a yogurt. What more could anyone want?
Janet Evanovich
Image
I went to the door, and Gary tried hard not to notice I was blue. He looked at his feet, and he looked above my head, and he cleared his throat. It's okay,' I said. 'I know I'm blue.' It caught me by surprise,' he said. 'I didn't want to seem rude.
Janet Evanovich
Image
If anything happened to you, I'd be so destroyed they'd have to strap me to a bed and feed me through a tube. After five or six years, I might be capable of taking care of Rex. In the interim, you should assign a guardian.
Janet Evanovich