Quote

If anything happened to you, I'd be so destroyed they'd have to strap me to a bed and feed me through a tube. After five or six years, I might be capable of taking care of Rex. In the interim, you should assign a guardian.

Janet Evanovich

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Anything
Destroyed
Might
Six
Strap
Years
Bed
Interim
Capable
Assign
Taking
Tube
Happened
Tubes
Five
Guardian
Care
Feed

More quotes by Janet Evanovich

Image
As Stephanie and Lula were going after the bad guys, Lula was making preparations from the trunk of her Firebird. Stephanie looked inside and stopped breathing for a beat. That's a rocket launcher! Yep, Lula said. It's a big boy. I got it at a yard sale in the projects.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I looked over at him. Is that a proposal? There was total silence for a couple beats. I'm not sure. It just popped out. Let me know when you're sure. Would you say yes? Morelli asked. I'm not sure.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I was waiting for my body receipt when Morelli walked in. He nodded to Ranger and grinned at me in my whiteness. “I was at my desk, and Mickey told me I had to come out to take a look,” Morelli said. “It’s floor,” I told him. “I can see that. If we add some milk and eggs, we can turn you into a cake.
Janet Evanovich
Image
You gonna take the case? It's not a case. It's a missing person. Sort of. You're gonna have a devil of a time finding him if it was aliens, Grandma said.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Is there anything else you need from me? Ranger asked. Not right now. There will come a time, Ranger said. Let me know when. And he disconnected. I opened the freezer and stuck my head in to cool off. If there'd been any more innuendo in that conversation, I could have fried an egg on my forehead.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Ranger plays by his own set of rules, and I don't have a complete copy.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I'd do the lifting, but I just got a manicure. And I notice you don't have a manicure at all. Only thing noticeable about your hands is the missing tan on your ring finger that I don't care about. -Lula
Janet Evanovich
Image
This isn't just a job. This is a service profession. We uphold the law, babe. Ranger
Janet Evanovich
Image
-You're gloating, Max. It's not flattering. Somebody needs to teach you a little humility.- -A good woman could do that.- -She'd have to be armed and dangerous.-
Janet Evanovich
Image
You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms. Joe Morelli
Janet Evanovich
Image
Maybe it was me, Grandma said.Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart?
Janet Evanovich
Image
Bullets are creepy. Stephenie
Janet Evanovich
Image
I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman.
Janet Evanovich
Image
How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.
Janet Evanovich
Image
I see you looking at my cookies,' my father said to Morelli. 'Don't even think about it. Go get your own cookies.
Janet Evanovich
Image
Sweetie, nothing that flies looks safe, including birds.
Janet Evanovich
Image
You're a marshmallow. Soft and sweet and when you get heated up you go all gooey and delicious.-
Janet Evanovich
Image
I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate. Grandma Mazur
Janet Evanovich
Image
I'm done with men. I have a hamster. That's all I need.
Janet Evanovich