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Were really screwed up, aren't we? In a very large way.
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Really
Way
Screwed
Large
Aren
More quotes by Janet Evanovich
Concentrate on doing the job, not the fear.
Janet Evanovich
Has it ever occurred to you that you might be delusional?' That's what the psychiatrist said, but I think he's wrong. There's an evil flying pizza out there, and it's got Brenda's name on it.
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I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up and strangle my grandmother.
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He squinted at me. What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?
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If anything happened to you, I'd be so destroyed they'd have to strap me to a bed and feed me through a tube. After five or six years, I might be capable of taking care of Rex. In the interim, you should assign a guardian.
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I'm for sure a workaholic. I'm a complete control freak and I take on way too many projects.
Janet Evanovich
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. this is it, he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep.this car has protective qualities You mean like a guardian angel? I mean, like, it has seatbelts
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Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet.
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When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said: She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank.
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The way I see it, living in New Jersey is a challenge, what with the toxic waste and the eighteen wheelers and the armed schizophrenics. Connie Rosolli
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Looks like you're on a roll. This is the second car you've toasted this week. Carl Costanza - Hot Six
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Your life isn't out of control. It's expanded.
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How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.
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I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman.
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No one expected a first year engineering student to build the perfect bridge.
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That's one of the things I like about Mary Lou. She's willing to believe the worst about anyone.
Janet Evanovich
Cupcake , you've been breaking my heart for as long as I've known you
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-You're gloating, Max. It's not flattering. Somebody needs to teach you a little humility.- -A good woman could do that.- -She'd have to be armed and dangerous.-
Janet Evanovich
I got out of the tub and had to squelch a scream when I saw my reflection in the vanity mirror. My hair looked like it had taken 2000 volts and been spray starched
Janet Evanovich
I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.
Janet Evanovich