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Aren't you something, Grandma said. I never saw a midget up close. Little person, Briggs said. And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either.
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Little
Aren
Something
Saws
Never
Close
Either
Anyone
Littles
Persons
Midget
Person
Grandma
More quotes by Janet Evanovich
Amen Lula said and she made the sign of the cross. I thought you were Baptist. Yeah, but we don't got any hand signals for an occasion like this.
Janet Evanovich
You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms. Joe Morelli
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I checked my phone messages. Three in all. The first was from Joe. “Hey, Cupcake.” That was it. That was the whole message. The second was from Ranger. “Yo.” Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox.
Janet Evanovich
I exchanged my flannel shirt for a Rangers jersey and zapped the television on. Probably I should make more phone calls, but the Rangers were playing and priorities were priorities.
Janet Evanovich
I've never been in this part of Trenton before. I don't feel comfortable driving around buildings that haven't got gang slogans sprayed on them. Look at this place. No boarded-up windows. No garbage in the gutter. No brothers selling goods on the street. Don't know how people can live like this.
Janet Evanovich
You deserved to get run over. And besides, I barely tapped you. The only reason you broke your leg was because you panicked and tripped over your own feet.
Janet Evanovich
Maybe your pregnant. Oops, hold on, you're not pregnant, on account of you're not gettin any.
Janet Evanovich
Men are like shoes. Some fit better than others. And sometimes you go out shopping and there's nothing you like. And then, as luck would have it, the next week you find two that are perfect, but you don't have the money to buy both.-
Janet Evanovich
I shot that sucker right in the gumpy. Grandma Mazur
Janet Evanovich
Looks like you're on a roll. This is the second car you've toasted this week. Carl Costanza - Hot Six
Janet Evanovich
He doesn’t look very smart,” Diesel said. “He’s not even giving me the finger.” “Can monkey’s do that?” Hal asked. Carl gave him the finger. “Cool!” Hal said.
Janet Evanovich
I failed math twice, never fully grasping probability theory. I mean, first off, who cares if you pick a black ball or a white ball out of the bag? And second, if you’re bent over about the color, don’t leave it to chance. Look in the damn bag and pick the color you want.
Janet Evanovich
I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.
Janet Evanovich
I wasn’t sure anymore what made a good marriage. There had to be love, of course, but there were so many different kinds of love. And clearly, some love was more enduring than others.
Janet Evanovich
I'm sorry about your Porsche. I can replace the Porsche. I can't replace you. You need to be more careful. I was just sitting in your car! Babe, you're a magnet for disaster.
Janet Evanovich
I felt my cell phone buzz, and I looked at the screen. Ranger. “Your GPS just went blank,” Ranger said when I answered. “The car exploded.” There was a beat of silence. “Rafael won the pool,” Ranger said. “Are you okay?” “Yes.” “I’ll send someone.
Janet Evanovich
The note wasn't signed, but I could tell it was from Morelli by the way my nipples got hard.
Janet Evanovich
I'm telling you, it's fu**ing hard to be classy
Janet Evanovich
Am I to assume you would rather not have us as clients? Let me think about that for a nanosecond, Dickie said. Yes! Last time you were in my office you tried to kill me. That's an exaggeration. Maim you, yes. Kill you, probably not.
Janet Evanovich
I always know it's Sunday because I wake up feeling apologetic. That's one of the cool things about being a Catholic . . . it's a multifaceted experience. If you lose the faith, chances are you'll keep the guilt, so it isn't as if you've been skunked altogether.
Janet Evanovich