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I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.

Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Need
Needs
Twice
Like
Idiot
Humble
Least
Keep
Look
Looks

More quotes by Janet Evanovich

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I see you looking at my cookies,' my father said to Morelli. 'Don't even think about it. Go get your own cookies.
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Since I write in first person and have no idea what goes on in men's heads.
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I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times.
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Here's a basic difference between Morelli and me. My first thought was always of cake. His first thought was always of sex. Don't get me wrong. I like sex . . . a lot. But it's never going to replace cake.
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He squinted at me. What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?
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Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet.
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I'd slept with Ranger! Not sexually, of course. But I'd been in his bed. And then there was the evil shower gel. It was all because of the shower gel, I said. Morelli's eyes narrowed. Shower gel? I made a major effort not to sigh. Long story. You probably don't want to hear it.
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You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out.
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You're a marshmallow. Soft and sweet and when you get heated up you go all gooey and delicious.-
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I could use some help with an FTA. What's your problem? He's old, and I'll look like a loser if I shoot him.
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I disconnected and made a mental note not to call Tank unless I was bleeding profusely, and he was the only other person on earth.
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These are desparate times. - Stephanie Plum
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How was your day? Morelli asked me. Oh, you know, the usual. Stole a truck. Blew up a building, and brought seven monkeys home with me.
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I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.
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I almost never shoot people.
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Your on your on with this one babe. Coward. Calling me names isn't going to get me in there. -Ranger and Stephanie
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If anything happened to you, I'd be so destroyed they'd have to strap me to a bed and feed me through a tube. After five or six years, I might be capable of taking care of Rex. In the interim, you should assign a guardian.
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At the other end of the room, Grandma had the lid up on Larry Lipinski. She was standing one foot on a folding chair, one foot on the edge of the casket, and she was taking pictures with a disposable camera.
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You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms. Joe Morelli
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If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk, I said to Ranger. Not drunk, Ranger said. Just relaxed and naked.
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