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One Ranger is all you'll ever need. - Ranger
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
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Ranger
Rangers
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More quotes by Janet Evanovich
I hung my head. Ranger was next on the list. “Yo,” Ranger said when he answered. “Small problem.” “No kidding. Your car just went off the screen.” “It sort of burned up.” Silence. “And you know that keypad you gave me? It was in the car.” “Babe.
Janet Evanovich
I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman.
Janet Evanovich
I disconnected and made a mental note not to call Tank unless I was bleeding profusely, and he was the only other person on earth.
Janet Evanovich
That's one of the things I like about Mary Lou. She's willing to believe the worst about anyone.
Janet Evanovich
Aren't you something, Grandma said. I never saw a midget up close. Little person, Briggs said. And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either.
Janet Evanovich
Some people learn from books, some listen to the advice of others, some learn from mistakes. I fit into the last category. So sue me.
Janet Evanovich
On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time.
Janet Evanovich
You're not looking for a partner, Ranger said. You're looking for an enforcer. You hate to run. You must be worried about getting into that black dress. What did you eat just now? Piece of cake? Candy bar? Everything, I said. I just ate everything.
Janet Evanovich
It's not the pizza, darlin', its my masculine presence. Joe Morelli
Janet Evanovich
I have bad car juju. -Stephanie Plum
Janet Evanovich
He [Ranger] peeled my [Stephanie] clothes off and wrangled me into bed. And then suddenly he was inside me. He once told me that time spent with him would ruin me for all other men. When he said it, I thought it was an outrageous threat. I no longer though it outrageous.
Janet Evanovich
Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table.
Janet Evanovich
Babe, you've destroyed a car, burned down two buildings, stapled a guy's nuts, and you have sixteen stitches in your leg. Take a night off. Have a glass of wine, watch some television, and go to bed early. -Ranger
Janet Evanovich
Opening my door to Dillon Ruddick, my bulding super. I handed him a cup of coffee. Sorry about the blood. What was it this time? No one reported gunfire. I hit a guy in the face with a hair dryer. Whoa. Dillon said. It wasn't my fault, I told him. Maybe we should lay down some linoleum here. It would make things easier for
Janet Evanovich
Look at you! You look like Rangeman Barbie. You got a gun and everything. -Lula
Janet Evanovich
God's a busy guy. He don't have time to micromanage. What are the chances he heard that? It's early in the morning. He's probably having breakfast with Mrs. God.
Janet Evanovich
Amen Lula said and she made the sign of the cross. I thought you were Baptist. Yeah, but we don't got any hand signals for an occasion like this.
Janet Evanovich
Omygod, I haven’t got years. I’ll have to hide in the Bat Cave.” “Once you go to the Bat Cave it’s forever, babe.” Eeek.
Janet Evanovich
Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head. Eddie DeChooch
Janet Evanovich
Ranger sent us to check on you, Hal said. We just got here, and we heard shots. Some moron ate my jelly doughnut, Lula said. So I shot him.
Janet Evanovich