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If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office.

Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Position
Pity
Gave
Office
Wouldn

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Nice dress. Take it off.
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Look at you! You look like Rangeman Barbie. You got a gun and everything. -Lula
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Some people learn from books, some listen to the advice of others, some learn from mistakes. I fit into the last category. So sue me.
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I want to see your tailpipe fading off into the sunset. Good luck, I thought. My tailpipe was somewhere on Route 1, along with my muffler.
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If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk, I said to Ranger. Not drunk, Ranger said. Just relaxed and naked.
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You ever get any death threats? How about ex-husbands or ex-boyfriends? You run over anyone recently?” ~ Morelli
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I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.
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I wasn’t sure anymore what made a good marriage. There had to be love, of course, but there were so many different kinds of love. And clearly, some love was more enduring than others.
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Stephanie, I'm begging you. Eat some doughnuts. I can't keep going like this. - Morelli
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You don't even need to go to college no more because you could learn how to do everything on YouTube.
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You can run, but you can't hide, Cupcake. Morelli said. I'll find you. You are such a cop. Tell me about it.
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I've never been in this part of Trenton before. I don't feel comfortable driving around buildings that haven't got gang slogans sprayed on them. Look at this place. No boarded-up windows. No garbage in the gutter. No brothers selling goods on the street. Don't know how people can live like this.
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And then it gets so hot that they keep the supermarkets too cold. Hot, cold. Hot, cold. It gives me the runs. Mr. Landowsky
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He squinted at me. What are you wearing? Is that some new form of birth control?
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Ranger sent us to check on you, Hal said. We just got here, and we heard shots. Some moron ate my jelly doughnut, Lula said. So I shot him.
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The elevator doors opened, and Ranger stepped out and spied Tank stretched out on the carpet. Fainted, I said. Ranger walked to Tank and stood hands on hips, staring down at him. Tank doesn't faint. I've been in firefights with him. He's a rock. Well, the rock fainted.
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Amen Lula said and she made the sign of the cross. I thought you were Baptist. Yeah, but we don't got any hand signals for an occasion like this.
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He's a good man, Ranger said. And you? I'm better.
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Suppose I lay down on the pavement and you run over me a few times with my own car...just for old times.
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