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I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate. Grandma Mazur

Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Two
Looker
Real
Slot
Grandma
Dollar
Picked
Machines
Mets
Dollars

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I exchanged my flannel shirt for a Rangers jersey and zapped the television on. Probably I should make more phone calls, but the Rangers were playing and priorities were priorities.
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You owe me! -Stephanie Why do I owe you? -Joe I caught your no good cousin. -Stephanie Yeah and in the process you burned down a funeral home, and damaged thousands of dollars of government property. -Joe Well if you are going to be picky about it.... -Stephanie
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You deserved to get run over. And besides, I barely tapped you. The only reason you broke your leg was because you panicked and tripped over your own feet.
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Since I write in first person and have no idea what goes on in men's heads.
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I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying.
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What's this outfit? You can't afford clothes? Are you wearing other peoples? Helen Plum
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And then it gets so hot that they keep the supermarkets too cold. Hot, cold. Hot, cold. It gives me the runs. Mr. Landowsky
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I had an alarm, I had nerve gas, I had a yogurt. What more could anyone want?
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Just because i know how to change a guys oil doesn't mean i want to spend the rest of my life on my back, staring up his undercarriage.
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Grandma Mazur stood two feet back from my mother. I gotta get me a pair if those, she said, eyeballing my shorts. I've still got pretty good legs, you know. She raised her skirt and looked down at her knees. What do you think? You think I'd look good in them biker things? Grandma Mazur had knees like doorknobs.
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I stuck my tongue out at him because I was feeling exceptionall mature.
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He had a body like batman
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-You're gloating, Max. It's not flattering. Somebody needs to teach you a little humility.- -A good woman could do that.- -She'd have to be armed and dangerous.-
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As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper.
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