Quote

I don't mean to change the subject or anything, but have you tried concealer on that zit? Cynthia Lotte - Hot Six

Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Mean
Cynthia
Hot
Six
Subject
Tried
Subjects
Change
Concealer
Anything
Zits

More quotes by Janet Evanovich

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Has it ever occurred to you that you might be delusional?' That's what the psychiatrist said, but I think he's wrong. There's an evil flying pizza out there, and it's got Brenda's name on it.
Janet Evanovich
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He's a good man, Ranger said. And you? I'm better.
Janet Evanovich
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I'd do the lifting, but I just got a manicure. And I notice you don't have a manicure at all. Only thing noticeable about your hands is the missing tan on your ring finger that I don't care about. -Lula
Janet Evanovich
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Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet.
Janet Evanovich
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As Stephanie and Lula were going after the bad guys, Lula was making preparations from the trunk of her Firebird. Stephanie looked inside and stopped breathing for a beat. That's a rocket launcher! Yep, Lula said. It's a big boy. I got it at a yard sale in the projects.
Janet Evanovich
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Sweetie, nothing that flies looks safe, including birds.
Janet Evanovich
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Suppose I lay down on the pavement and you run over me a few times with my own car...just for old times.
Janet Evanovich
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I always wanted to eat with a Negro,” Grandma said. Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney- assed old white woman,” Lula said. “So I guess this works out good.
Janet Evanovich
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She doesn’t know,” Cate said. “Kellen is a secret. I didn’t think my mother would approve.” “Why wouldn’t your mother approve?” Pugg asked. “It’s my job,” Kellen said. “I kill people. It pays well, but it’s not universally socially acceptable.
Janet Evanovich
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Make sure your main characters are likeable. They can be flawed, but your readers need to be able to root for them.
Janet Evanovich
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You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms. Joe Morelli
Janet Evanovich
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Oh good. I love being bait for a homicidal mutilator. Stephanie Plum
Janet Evanovich
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Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.
Janet Evanovich
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How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.
Janet Evanovich
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Are you afraid of me? Uh... yes.' The smile stayed fixed in place. 'You should be. You locked me in a refrigerator truck with three dead people. Sooner or later I'm going to get you for it.
Janet Evanovich
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I may not be the most patient woman in the world, or the most glamorous, or the most athletic, but I'm right up there at the top of the line when it comes to resiliency.
Janet Evanovich
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I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times.
Janet Evanovich
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Suppose something goes wrong? Suppose you need a big full-figure woman like me to help straighten things out? Lula
Janet Evanovich
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You don't even need to go to college no more because you could learn how to do everything on YouTube.
Janet Evanovich
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I rushed us out of your parents' house because I didn't think I could manage two hours at the dinner table with everyone focused on Joe Loosey's joystick sitting in the refrigerator next to the applesauce.
Janet Evanovich