Quote

You could be the Mega Mage of wizards. You could rule Minionfire. Do you really think so?' Yeah, but you'd have to make a deal with the wood elves.' I don't like the wood elves.' They're okay. They're misunderstood.

Janet Evanovich

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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Really
Misunderstood
Make
Wood
Think
Woods
Thinking
Rule
Like
Yeah
Mage
Okay
Elves
Deal
Mega
Deals
Wizards

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Grandma Mazur stood two feet back from my mother. I gotta get me a pair if those, she said, eyeballing my shorts. I've still got pretty good legs, you know. She raised her skirt and looked down at her knees. What do you think? You think I'd look good in them biker things? Grandma Mazur had knees like doorknobs.
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Your life isn't out of control. It's expanded.
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I always wanted to eat with a Negro,” Grandma said. Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney- assed old white woman,” Lula said. “So I guess this works out good.
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Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.
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I'm telling you, it's fu**ing hard to be classy
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Turns out, that's how it is with weddings. You just keep getting in deeper and deeper until you want to throw up.
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I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up and strangle my grandmother.
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Ranger plays by his own set of rules, and I don't have a complete copy.
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Maybe your pregnant. Oops, hold on, you're not pregnant, on account of you're not gettin any.
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I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying.
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I wasnt always a writer. When I went to college and majored in fine arts, I was a painter. Then I was a stay-at-home mom.
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I disconnected and made a mental note not to call Tank unless I was bleeding profusely, and he was the only other person on earth.
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I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.
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On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time.
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Maybe it was me, Grandma said.Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart?
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