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You know, I have no web presence, and I don't know that there's many people who really do know me that much anymore.
Janeane Garofalo
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Janeane Garofalo
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 28
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Political Activist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Newton
New Jersey
Janeane Marie Garofalo
Presence
Anymore
Many
Much
Really
People
More quotes by Janeane Garofalo
Sometimes the critics review me harshly for not being critical of government but it's not me who has said I was political.
Janeane Garofalo
It is just as painful to me when I do poorly. If the fault is all mine, that's what's painful. If it's a situation where no one could have succeeded, I don't feel as bad.
Janeane Garofalo
I can do most anything and not have a problem with it. The only time I have negative attention is when I run naked through the streets brandishing a handgun.
Janeane Garofalo
I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half-empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.
Janeane Garofalo
You can tell a lot about a person by how excited they are to do the Macarena.
Janeane Garofalo
My hell is going to be the stairmaster wing of Dante's inferno, where they're gonna tape my feet to the pedals and the only music I get is Michael Bolton karaoke style.
Janeane Garofalo
Protesting the color of a man's skin is not a worthy protest.
Janeane Garofalo
Every year my family would pile into the car for our vacation and drive 80 trillion miles just to prove we couldn't get along in any setting.
Janeane Garofalo
The teabagger thing and the right-wing thing - they pick easy targets, and a female in the entertainment industry is low-hanging fruit. It's very easy to mock and marginalize people in general who are in the entertainment industry, for some reason. But then definitely there's the double standard and the misogyny that goes through it as well.
Janeane Garofalo
Red flag of the eating disorder: the muffin. Keep your eye on the ladies with the muffins... and sometimes I'll just eat the muffin top.
Janeane Garofalo
I'm not a disciplined writer.
Janeane Garofalo
Granted, not really a joke, but how often do you get a mic in your hand? You know? So. I am sorry but don't anybody trip on my soap box on the way out. Don't anybody trip over that. And the chip on my shoulder's a little heavy. I have back problems now.
Janeane Garofalo
The Bible, I've said it before, is a beautifully written work of fiction.
Janeane Garofalo
I'm almost 46. You become no longer even regarded in a sexual way. As you get older you're just taken out of that realm. So it's not anything that particularly confronts me very much at all.
Janeane Garofalo
I don't hate myself, as a general rule. I'd say the best way to describe it is that I have moments of self-loathing at fairly regular intervals.
Janeane Garofalo
I think we all remember where we were when Rush Hour hit the water. That was an important day.
Janeane Garofalo
If you don't do any self-examinations or see a doctor ever, you'll live forever. That's how you do it. The diagnosis is what gets you. You just have a don't ask, don't tell policy with any and all bodily functions.
Janeane Garofalo
There is no way any rational, reasonable person can say that the Bush Administration has been good for America.
Janeane Garofalo
Also, as I've gotten older and more mature, I've become much more comfortable in my own skin. After 25 years of doing stand-up, that's reflected onstage.
Janeane Garofalo
I'm not a big fan of the comics competing against each other.
Janeane Garofalo