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Sex is the quickest way to ruin a friendship.
Janeane Garofalo
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Janeane Garofalo
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 28
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Political Activist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Newton
New Jersey
Janeane Marie Garofalo
Way
Quickest
Bites
Ruin
Ruins
Friendship
Sex
More quotes by Janeane Garofalo
As actors, it is our responsibility to read the newspapers, and then say what we read on television like it's our own opinion.
Janeane Garofalo
Sage advice? If you're drunk, stay away from the phone. You can't get the answering machine message back.
Janeane Garofalo
I got mugged. And they got my knapsack with my comedy notebook in it. So if anybody see two cholos bombing at the Funny Bone chain, that would be them. Just give me a jingle.
Janeane Garofalo
Last night, I went to a birthday party, and this girl brought a cake and a cheesecake. And the other girls that lived in the apartment, I swear to God, all night long: 'You're taking that cake with you when you go. That cake's not staying in this house.' Like it's this evil, Hope Diamond, nuclear, horrifying cursed thing.
Janeane Garofalo
Sometimes the critics review me harshly for not being critical of government but it's not me who has said I was political.
Janeane Garofalo
I'm not a disciplined writer.
Janeane Garofalo
A war is going to destroy our economy even further. It's going to be a threefold humanitarian disaster.
Janeane Garofalo
Anybody who French bashes just might as well wear a badge that says 'I am a follower! I don't think for myself and I have no idea what I'm talking about.' That would be a French basher.
Janeane Garofalo
I don't know who you're referring to exactly who said, 'What has Iraq done to us?'
Janeane Garofalo
I would have to say loneliness is next to uncleanliness.
Janeane Garofalo
We got married drunk in Vegas . . . We dated for a year, and we got married at a drive-through chapel in a cab. [We thought] you have to go down to the courthouse and sign papers and stuff, so who knew? We were married, and apparently now that [Rob] is getting married for real, his lawyer dug up something.
Janeane Garofalo
Historically the mainstream media has never been particularly friendly to any socially progressive ideas.
Janeane Garofalo
I was just utterly oblivious to how difficult it was, and how difficult it was going to be, and then also in the mid-eighties through the mid-nineties there was a boom of sorts. So there were plenty of stages. If I had started now, there would be very few places to get better and better.
Janeane Garofalo
When I see guys in bars wearing the real fitted kind of Calvin Klein v-neck t-shirts I just want to go up to them and be like, 'Oh, do you work out? Your tricep looks so great - thank you.'
Janeane Garofalo
When I see the American flag, I go, 'Oh my God, you're insulting me.'
Janeane Garofalo
I'm a walker. I enjoy walking, which I think psychologically expresses my feelings of wanting liberation without exerting myself too much.
Janeane Garofalo
Well I don't know what the city of Hollywood knows about foreign policy, but do I know that a lot of people do learn and educate themselves about policy and I don't have to be a policy expert to know that this will be a disaster.
Janeane Garofalo
We're our own worst enemies a lot of the time, but I still blame men.
Janeane Garofalo
Pedestrian's rights - because we live in California, I've got to address this issue. I don't know where on the fence I am about that. I suppose if I'm walking, I'm all for it, but if I'm driving, that's a whole other can of worms.
Janeane Garofalo
Red flag of the eating disorder: the muffin. Keep your eye on the ladies with the muffins... and sometimes I'll just eat the muffin top.
Janeane Garofalo