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Also, as I've gotten older and more mature, I've become much more comfortable in my own skin. After 25 years of doing stand-up, that's reflected onstage.

Janeane Garofalo

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Janeane Garofalo
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 28
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Political Activist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Newton
New Jersey
Janeane Marie Garofalo
Also
Mature
Much
Gotten
Years
Skin
Skins
Older
Comfortable
Stand
Reflected
Become
Onstage

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I'm not a disciplined writer.
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Sage advice? If you're drunk, stay away from the phone. You can't get the answering machine message back.
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Sex is the quickest way to ruin a friendship.
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Silence does not equal patriotism. Obedience is not the American way.
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So, apparently, if you are a pre-sentient mass of cells, this country will protect you and your rights to the n-th degree. If you have made the mistake of becoming an Iraqi citizen, apparently we can just drop bombs on you with impunity.
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My hell is going to be the stairmaster wing of Dante's inferno, where they're gonna tape my feet to the pedals and the only music I get is Michael Bolton karaoke style.
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I would tell the Democrats in Washington who are trying to be civil with the bipartisanship to please stop and let the joker die once and for all, let the agents of chaos hit the pavement, stop picking them up.
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I hate high fashion. I hate that we reward people for being genetic freaks. You hear the guys announcing the runway shows saying, 'A pretty face is your best asset this season.' And what? Ugly girls had a free ride last year?
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There is no way any rational, reasonable person can say that the Bush Administration has been good for America.
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If you don't do any self-examinations or see a doctor ever, you'll live forever. That's how you do it. The diagnosis is what gets you. You just have a don't ask, don't tell policy with any and all bodily functions.
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I don't even know why somebody's Twittering as me. I don't understand it, and I wish that it would stop. But there's nothing that can be done. It's so terrible.
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I absolutely realize that a celebrity spokesperson is not ideal.
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As you can tell from watching the show, I'm not a strong joke writer per se.
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There's nothing wrong with the word conspiracy. It just means 'to breathe together.'
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All roads lead to my dogs, don't they?
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Tina Fey is part of a generation of women who have changed the face of comedy at 'Second City,' 'SNL,' in sitcoms and in film.
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Like I said, I'm just grateful when anyone offers me a job. It's like, Okay. I'll do it. FBI agent is one, too, when you get older. When you're kind of an older lady hard-ass, FBI tends to happen. It's just because I'd like to work rather than not work, so I'm just happy if somebody wants me to do anything.
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I don't really have funny things to say about politics. I wish I did, but I don't.
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I guess when your heart gets broken, you sort of start to see the cracks in everything.
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