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I would prefer to be well-liked in any and all situations.
Janeane Garofalo
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Janeane Garofalo
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 28
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Political Activist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Newton
New Jersey
Janeane Marie Garofalo
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More quotes by Janeane Garofalo
Leaving your ears open to the suggestions of others only closes the mind's eye, thereby creating a type of spiritual glaucoma.
Janeane Garofalo
There's no reason to be doing comedy during the day in a hot tent. I don't know why anyone thinks it's a good idea, but festival after festival keeps doing it. I did see some of the other comedians struggling.
Janeane Garofalo
My dream would be to be on a show that shoots in New York, because I live here, and then I could walk to work.
Janeane Garofalo
You know, I've had Botox. The woman who does it is very good, obviously. Very conservative.
Janeane Garofalo
I got mugged. And they got my knapsack with my comedy notebook in it. So if anybody see two cholos bombing at the Funny Bone chain, that would be them. Just give me a jingle.
Janeane Garofalo
I don't know who you're referring to exactly who said, 'What has Iraq done to us?'
Janeane Garofalo
I don't even know why somebody's Twittering as me. I don't understand it, and I wish that it would stop. But there's nothing that can be done. It's so terrible.
Janeane Garofalo
I'm sorry for being me. I won't ever do it again.
Janeane Garofalo
I would tell the Democrats in Washington who are trying to be civil with the bipartisanship to please stop and let the joker die once and for all, let the agents of chaos hit the pavement, stop picking them up.
Janeane Garofalo
I guess when your heart gets broken, you sort of start to see the cracks in everything.
Janeane Garofalo
Also, as I've gotten older and more mature, I've become much more comfortable in my own skin. After 25 years of doing stand-up, that's reflected onstage.
Janeane Garofalo
Protesting the color of a man's skin is not a worthy protest.
Janeane Garofalo
Pedestrian's rights - because we live in California, I've got to address this issue. I don't know where on the fence I am about that. I suppose if I'm walking, I'm all for it, but if I'm driving, that's a whole other can of worms.
Janeane Garofalo
So, apparently, if you are a pre-sentient mass of cells, this country will protect you and your rights to the n-th degree. If you have made the mistake of becoming an Iraqi citizen, apparently we can just drop bombs on you with impunity.
Janeane Garofalo
I absolutely realize that a celebrity spokesperson is not ideal.
Janeane Garofalo
It is just as painful to me when I do poorly. If the fault is all mine, that's what's painful. If it's a situation where no one could have succeeded, I don't feel as bad.
Janeane Garofalo
There's been times when I have actually had sex indoors. And then you kind of sober up a little when it's over. I become like a bartender at 2 AM. OK, people, let's move it out! Yeah, you don't have to go home but you can't stay here.
Janeane Garofalo
The Bible, I've said it before, is a beautifully written work of fiction.
Janeane Garofalo
It's been hard in entertainment as a 45-year-old woman to find jobs. They get fewer and far between if you're older, unless you're one of the few lucky ones who work constantly, like Meryl Streep.
Janeane Garofalo
You know, I have no web presence, and I don't know that there's many people who really do know me that much anymore.
Janeane Garofalo