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When I first came into this world, Elvis was already fat.
Jane Wagner
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Jane Wagner
Age: 89
Born: 1935
Born: February 26
Actor
Film Director
Record Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Writer
Morristown
Tennessee
Already
Came
Firsts
First
World
Elvis
Fats
More quotes by Jane Wagner
Sex is such a personal thing - why do we insist on sharing it with another person?
Jane Wagner
If you are a human being, you might as well face it. You are going to rub a lot of people the wrong way.
Jane Wagner
I am sick of being the victim of trends I reflect but don't even understand.
Jane Wagner
Just think: your family are the people most likely to give you the flu.
Jane Wagner
The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.
Jane Wagner
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.
Jane Wagner
I have gained and lost the same 10 pounds so many times over and over again my cellulite must have deja vu!
Jane Wagner
Infinity: Time on an ego trip.
Jane Wagner
I made some studies, and reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it. I can take it in small doses, but as a lifestyle, I found it too confining. It was just too needful it expected me to be there for it all the time, and with all I have to do--I had to let something go.
Jane Wagner
What you try to bury just ends up burying you.
Jane Wagner
I worry that humanity has been advanced to its present level of incompetency because evolution works on the Peter Principle.
Jane Wagner
Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent.
Jane Wagner
People don't need sex so much as they need to be listened to.
Jane Wagner
Reality is just a collective hunch.
Jane Wagner
The human mind is kind of like a piñata. When it breaks open, there's a lot of surprises inside. Once you get the piñata perspective, you see that losing your mind can be a peak experience.
Jane Wagner
The truth can be made up if you know how.
Jane Wagner
Like what's the point being a health nut by day if you're a coke head at night.
Jane Wagner
Childhood comes at a time in your life when you are too young to understand what you are going through. And you're too young to understand that you are too young to understand.
Jane Wagner
I bet the worst part about dying is the part where your whole life passes before you.
Jane Wagner
Ahhhhhhhh. There is nothing natural about natural childbirth. It is as close to a freak accident as anything I can think of. Why I picked a time like this to go off drugs?
Jane Wagner