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American girls often marry someone they can't stand to spite someone they can.

James Thurber

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James Thurber
Age: 66 †
Born: 1894
Born: December 18
Died: 1961
Died: November 2
Autobiographer
Cartoonist
Drawer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Columbus
Ohio
James Grover Thurber
Someone
Marry
Spite
Girls
Sex
Stand
American
Girl
Often

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I myself have known some profoundly thoughtful dogs.
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Human Dignity has gleamed only now and then and here and there, in lonely splendor, throughout the ages, a hope of the better men, never an achievement of the majority.
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This is the posture of fortunes slave: one foot in the gravy, one foot in the grave.
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Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.
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History is replete with proofs, from Cato the Elder to Kennedy the Younger, that if you scratch a statesman you find an actor, but it is becoming harder and harder, in our time, to tell government from show business.
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The unicorn is a mythical beast.
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Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else?
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There is something about a poet which leads us to believe that he died, in many cases, as long as 20 years before his birth.
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I'm 65 and I guess that puts me in with the geriatrics. But if there were fifteen months in every year, I'd only be 48. That's the trouble with us. We number everything. Take women, for example. I think they deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of 28 and 40.
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Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.
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Sixty minutes of thinking of any kind is bound to lead to confusion and unhappiness.
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I make mistakes, but I am on the side of Good, the Golux said, by accident and happenchance. I had high hopes of being Evil when I was two, but in my youth I came upon a firefly burning in a spider's web. I saved the victim's life. The firefly's ? said the minstrel. The spider's. The blinking arsonist had set the web on fire.
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The past is an old armchair in the attic, the present an ominous ticking sound, and the future is anybody's guess.
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I drew pictures rapidly and with few lines, because I had to write most of the pieces, too, and couldn't monkey long with the drawings. The divine urge was no higher than that.
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But what is all this fear of and opposition to Oblivion? What is the matter with the soft Darkness, the Dreamless Sleep?
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The most dangerous food is wedding cake.
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A word to the wise is not sufficient if it doesn't make sense.
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No male can beat a female in the long run because they have it over us in sheer, damn longevity.
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