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For one thing, she pronounced flowers 'flars' and I couldn't let it slide.

James Thurber

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James Thurber
Age: 66 †
Born: 1894
Born: December 18
Died: 1961
Died: November 2
Autobiographer
Cartoonist
Drawer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Columbus
Ohio
James Grover Thurber
Slides
Flowers
Flower
Couldn
Thing
Pronounced
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More quotes by James Thurber

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The sanity of the average banquet speaker lasts about two and a half months at the end of that time he begins to mutter to himself, and calls out in his sleep.
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Hundreds of hysterical persons must confuse these phenomena with messages from the beyond and take their glory to the bishop rather than the eye doctor.
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It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.
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Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.
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Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!
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A husband should not insult his wife publicly, at parties. He should insult her in the privacy of the home.
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I was seized by the stern hand of Compulsion, that dark, unreasonable Urge that impels women to clean house in the middle of the night.
James Thurber
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I hate women because they have brought into the currency of our language such expressions as all righty and yes indeedy and hundreds of others.
James Thurber
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Writers of comedy have outlook, whereas writers of tragedy have, according to them, insight.
James Thurber
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I'm 65 and I guess that puts me in with the geriatrics. But if there were fifteen months in every year, I'd only be 48. That's the trouble with us. We number everything. Take women, for example. I think they deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of 28 and 40.
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Man is troubled by what might be called the Dog Wish, a strange and involved compulsion to be as happy and carefree as a dog
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I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.
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Time is for dragonflies and angels. The former live too little and the latter live too long.
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Nowadays men lead lives of noisy desperation.
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The most dangerous food is wedding cake.
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I love the idea of there being two sexes, don't you?
James Thurber
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The paths of glory at least lead to the Grave, but the paths of duty may not get you Anywhere.
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Unless artists can remember what it was to be a little boy, they are only half complete as artist and as man.
James Thurber
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Remember laughter. You'll need it even in the blessed isles of Ever After.
James Thurber
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I write humor the way a surgeon operates, because it is a livelihood, because I have a great urge to do it, because many interesting challenges are set up, and because I have the hope it may do some good.
James Thurber