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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?
James Thurber
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James Thurber
Age: 66 †
Born: 1894
Born: December 18
Died: 1961
Died: November 2
Autobiographer
Cartoonist
Drawer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Columbus
Ohio
James Grover Thurber
Wrong
Phones
Funny
Conflict
Wells
Answer
Well
Number
Numbers
Comedy
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Called
Phone
More quotes by James Thurber
Laughter need not be cut out of anything, since it improves everything.
James Thurber
I make mistakes, but I am on the side of Good, the Golux said, by accident and happenchance. I had high hopes of being Evil when I was two, but in my youth I came upon a firefly burning in a spider's web. I saved the victim's life. The firefly's ? said the minstrel. The spider's. The blinking arsonist had set the web on fire.
James Thurber
Dogs are obsessed with being happy.
James Thurber
Comedy has ceased to be a challenge to the mental processes. It has become a therapy of relaxation, a kind of tranquilizing drug.
James Thurber
A husband should not insult his wife publicly, at parties. He should insult her in the privacy of the home.
James Thurber
So much has already been written about everything that you can't find out anything about it.
James Thurber
You are all a lost generation, Gertrude Stein said to Hemingway. We weren't lost. We knew where we were, all right, but we wouldn't go home. Ours was the generation that stayed up all night.
James Thurber
Sixty minutes of thinking of any kind is bound to lead to confusion and unhappiness.
James Thurber
Don't get it right, just get it written.
James Thurber
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.
James Thurber
Writers of comedy have outlook, whereas writers of tragedy have, according to them, insight.
James Thurber
Columbus is a town in which almost anything is likely to happen, and in which almost everything has.
James Thurber
I always begin at the left with the opening word of the sentence and read toward the right and I recommend this method.
James Thurber
The sanity of the average banquet speaker lasts about two and a half months at the end of that time he begins to mutter to himself, and calls out in his sleep.
James Thurber
Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!
James Thurber
Muggs was always sorry, Mother said, when he bit someone, but we could never understand how she figured this out. He didn't act sorry.
James Thurber
There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else.
James Thurber
No male can beat a female in the long run because they have it over us in sheer, damn longevity.
James Thurber
The paths of glory at least lead to the Grave, but the paths of duty may not get you Anywhere.
James Thurber
We all have faults, and mine is being wicked.
James Thurber
