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Our parents were a test tube and a turkey baster.
James Patterson
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James Patterson
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: March 22
Actor
Advertising Person
Author
Film Producer
Novelist
Philanthropist
Screenwriter
Television Producer
Newburgh
New York
James Brendan Patterson
James B. Patterson
Tube
Tubes
Turkeys
Turkey
Test
Tests
Parents
Parent
More quotes by James Patterson
Great, they give blind kids guns, I said, trying to lessen his horror. I don't even let Iggy have a gun. Usually.
James Patterson
I muttered a swear word to myself. After I heard Angel cussing like a sailor when she stubbed her toe, my new resolution was to watch my language. All I needed was a six-year-old mutant with a potty mouth
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You stand out like a fart in a church.
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I was crazily, deeply, incredibly, joyously, terrifiedly in love.
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What are we but our stories?
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Max, if you survive your final test, can you steal me one of those magic outfits for me? I'll try to get one for each of us. Hey! 'If'?
James Patterson
...Drifting downstream in a row boat doesn't count against your life span.
James Patterson
The weird, weird thing about devastating loss is that life actually goes on. When you're faced with a tragedy, a loss so huge that you have no idea how you can live through it, somehow, the world keeps turning, the seconds keep ticking.
James Patterson
I flipped down the visor so I could check myself in the mirror, and something small and heavy dropped into my lap. I froze, my breath stuck in my throat. What—? Gingerly, I looked down. It wasn’t a grenade. It was a key ring. One key was for this van. I looked at it blankly. “Well, that’ll simplify things,” Fang said.
James Patterson
My thing is when we're doing a movie or TV show, I just want to go in and look at it and go, That was great.
James Patterson
Am I tough? Am I strong? Am I hard-core? Absolutely. Did I whimper with pathetic delight when I sank my teeth into my hot fried-chicken sandwich? You betcha.
James Patterson
I stared at her in amazement. How do you even live with yourself?...You're willing to sell children to a foreign government so they can be used as weapons, possibly against other Americans. I don't get it. Were you hiding behind a door on morals and ethics day?...You couldn't mother someone if they shot five gallons of estrogen into your vei
James Patterson
I write larger than life. It's what I do.
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How could you stop loving me?
James Patterson
When your own romantic life is falling apart, everyone else's looks fabulous.
James Patterson
Fang looked at me, hope in his eyes, and I smirked at him. I save the huge emotional kissy-face for imminent death scenes. This probably didn't qualify.
James Patterson
So the first thing we're gonna do, I told him, is push you off the roof.
James Patterson
He landed 10 feet below with a sickening crunch-i'm guessing his enhancements didn't allow him to bounce back up like a ball. we call that a design flaw.
James Patterson
If by 'miracle kids' you mean innocent test-tube babies whose DNA was forcibly unraveled and merged with two percent avian genes, yeah, I guess that would be us, I said. Because it's a miracle that we're not complete nut jobs and mutant disasters.
James Patterson
You...are...a...fridge...with wings,' Fang ground out, punching an Eraser hard with every word. 'We're...freaking...ballet...dancers.
James Patterson
