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Dr. Martinez: I take it you don't want me to call your parent? Max: Uh, no. Hello, lab? May I speak to the test tube please?

James Patterson

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James Patterson
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: March 22
Actor
Advertising Person
Author
Film Producer
Novelist
Philanthropist
Screenwriter
Television Producer
Newburgh
New York
James Brendan Patterson
James B. Patterson
Please
Parent
Tube
Call
Max
Speak
Labs
May
Tubes
Take
Hello
Test
Tests

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He gives my hand a tight squeeze, but that desperation, that urgency between us is gone. No insecurities. Max and Fang. Fang and Max. No longer a question. We just are.
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You're just here for the ride. For the incredible, indescribable Maximum Ride. --Max's Voice
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I can talk to fish! Angel said happily, water dripping off her long, skinny body. Ask one over for dinner, Fang said, joining us.
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Louisiana, the state road maintenance forgot.
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When I wanted information, it was silent when I didn't want to hear from it, it got chatty. It was alost as irritating as Fang.
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I muttered a swear word to myself. After I heard Angel cussing like a sailor when she stubbed her toe, my new resolution was to watch my language. All I needed was a six-year-old mutant with a potty mouth
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Why would you let [the TV audiences] build a habit of going to the cable networks? So I think they've obviously smartened up now, and they're not giving the summer to cable anymore.
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They call me, The Sharkalator
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When I write I pretend I'm telling a story to someone in the room and I don't want them to get up until I'm finished.
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Jackpot, Max! Jackpot! It was Fang and he was giggling hysterically. For those of you just joining us, Fang doesn't giggle, esspecially hysterically.
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Fang swerved closer to me, big and supremely graceful, like a black panther with wings. Oh, God. I'm so stupid. Forget I just said that. He needs a Band-Aid, I said. A look passed between me and Fang, full of suppressed humor, relief, understanding,love — Forget I said that too. I don't know what's wrong with me.
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A lot of writers fall in love with their sentences or their construction of sentences, and sometimes that's great, but not everybody is Gabriel Garcia Marquez or James Joyce. A lot of people like to pretend that they are, and they wind up not giving people a good read or enlightening them.
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After all, Fnick is Superman, said Iggy. Shut up, Jeff, I said, but I was smiling. I lifted Iggy's fingers to my face so that he knew.
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You're my best friend, my first and only love, and the most beautiful girl I've ever seen
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I love to tell stories. It's a delight for me.
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I'll just ask now: What is it about my persona that draws every insane, power-hungry nutcase to me like a magnet?
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Yes, I said. My name is seven-five-nine-nine-three-nine-ex-dash-one. Junior.
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My favorite books are actually very complicated - 'One Hundred Years of Solitude', 'Ulysses'.
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Was this normalcy-predictable patterns, the certainty of doing the same thing everyday? Because if so, normalcy was about to make me freak out and start screaming.
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Jane-Sweetie, we've talked about your weight- my mother began. I'm only eight years old, I said. How about I promise to be anorexic later?
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