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If Mother had to be told not to shove the entire brick of Ivory up Junior's hindquarters, constipation is the least of his problems.

James Lileks

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James Lileks
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: August 9
Journalist
Told
Shove
Least
Ivory
Mother
Brick
Problem
Junior
Juniors
Bricks
Entire
Problems
Constipation

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There are three stages to a man's life. 1. He laughs at Clark Griswold. 2. He sympathizes deeply with Clark Griswold. 3. He laughs at Clark Griswold.
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The newspaper is a lecture. The Web is a conversation.
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The popular Arab imagination is a pliant and inventive thing it can explain any defeat. It is a compass that always points toward the Jew.
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Contempt for the things people choose of their own free will is, at its heart, contempt for free will.
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All you need to know about Arafat was that he insisted on wearing a pistol when he addressed the UN General Assembly. And all you need to know about the UN, I suppose, is that they let him.
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I’ll feel that horrible feeling in my stomach you get when you’ve gone over to the Dark Side. But I’ll be fine. That’s the good thing about the Dark Side. Eventually, your eyes adjust.
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The mind forever turns on the lathe of its own contradictions.
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What unnerves so many liberals about talk radio? Simple: It's the unapologetic nature of the conversation, the unwavering sense of certainty. Where's the nuance? The shades of gray? We all know truth is a fragile butterfly dancing in and out of shadow and light, and these guys act as though truth is a rhino charging across a sunlit veldt.
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It takes a particularly rarified variety of idiot to look at a Jew-hating fascist with a small mustache - and decide that his opponent is the Nazi.
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I've always wondered if there was a Hezbollah version of minesweeper where you get points for blowing up on your first move.
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The same people who accuse America of coddling dictators are sputtering with bilious fury because we actually deposed one.
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When your opponent sets up a straw man, set it on fire and kick the cinders around the stage. Don't worry about losing the Strawperson- American community vote.
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If you think the ’80s were dumber than the ’70s, either you weren’t there or you weren’t paying attention.
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