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I regularly sell out more in England than I do in America.

Jackie Mason

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Jackie Mason
Age: 93 †
Born: 1928
Born: June 9
Died: 2021
Died: July 24
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Rabbi
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Sheboygan
Wisconsin
Yacov Moshe Hakohen Maza
Sell
Sells
England
America
Regularly

More quotes by Jackie Mason

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All the Democrats do is bicker. They're not concerned about the war or the fate of the United States of America. They're desperate characters.
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A Jew never laughs without looking at his wife for approval.
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Jews are living in the past and they can't get over it.
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I am excited about getting back to what I do best and what my audience likes best, I am writing new jokes every day and soon Ill be telling them every night. Just me, one Jew talking and that's it.
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America is the only country in the world where you can burn the flag but can't tear the tag off the mattress.
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I always thought music was more important than sex—then I thought if I don't hear a concert for a year-and-a-half it doesn't bother me.
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I've got a friend who is half-Jewish and half-Italian. If he can't buy it wholesale, he steals it!
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Honesty is nothin' compared to decency.
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Ten years ago if you would have told me that Mrs. Clinton would be the frontrunner for the Democratic nomination, I'd have never believed you. Her only qualifications for office are that she's Mr. Clinton's partner. And what does that mean? The two of them stand for dishonesty and corruption.
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Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
Jackie Mason
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When most people return from Europe, they tell tales of all the sites they saw, the shopping, the entertainment, etc. Jews, on the other hand, return and say I had this slice of cake in Austria, let me tell you, I don't know how they make it! It was great!
Jackie Mason
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The pamphlet uses my name, my likeness, my 'shtick' (if you will), and my very act, which is derived from my personality, to attract attention and converts.
Jackie Mason
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People make fools out of themselves in all sorts of ways. No particular qualifications or particular criteria are necessary.
Jackie Mason
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There are more Democratic schmucks than there are Republican ones.
Jackie Mason
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You know how many stunning women told me they can't stand a good-looking man? ... Women feel secure with an ugly guy because a man in bad shape isn't gonna cheat.
Jackie Mason
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It's not a query of staying wholesome. It's a query of discovering a illness you want.
Jackie Mason
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Predictions are preposterous.
Jackie Mason
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I've found that my humor goes over big in London.
Jackie Mason
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My father was a very successful businessman, but he was ruined in the stock market crash. A big stockbroker jumped out the window and fell on his pushcart.
Jackie Mason
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The New York Times does an unbelievable amount of damage because every day television and radio stations along with the rest of media take their lead on the way the news should be presented along with what actually is the news.
Jackie Mason