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Sensitive. That killed me. That guy Morrow was about as sensitive as a toilet seat.

J. D. Salinger

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J. D. Salinger
Age: 91 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 1
Died: 2010
Died: January 27
Author
Novelist
Writer
New York City
New York
Jerome David Salinger
Jerome Salinger
Toilet
Morrow
Toilets
Seat
Seats
Sensitive
Killed
Guy

More quotes by J. D. Salinger

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What I really felt like, though, was committing suicide. I felt like jumping out the window. I probably would've done it, too, if I'd been sure somebody'd cover me up as soon as I landed. I didn't want a bunch of stupid rubbernecks looking at me when I was all gory.
J. D. Salinger
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It was that kind of a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed a road.
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That's something that annoys the hell out of me-I mean if somebody says the coffee's all ready and it isn't.
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If Death stepped miraculously through the glass and came in after you, in all probability you just got up and went along with him, ferociously but quietly.
J. D. Salinger
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I used to think she was quite intelligent , in my stupidity. The reason I did was because she knew quite a lot about the theater and plays and literature and all that stuff. If somebody knows quite a lot about all those things, it takes you quite a while to find out whether they're really stupid or not.
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We are, all four of us, blood relatives, and we speak a kind of esoteric, family language, a sort of semantic geometry in which the shortest distance between any two points is a fullish circle.
J. D. Salinger
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She was a girl who for a ringing phone dropped exactly nothing. She looked as if her phone had been ringing continually ever since she had reached puberty.
J. D. Salinger
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There isn't anyone anywhere who isn't Seymour's Fat Lady. Don't you know that? Don't you know that goddam secret yet? And don't you know — listen to me, now — don't you know who that Fat Lady really is? . . . Ah, buddy. Ah, buddy. It's Christ Himself. Christ Himself, buddy.
J. D. Salinger
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I know. I'm very hard to talk to. I realize that.
J. D. Salinger
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... even the most sublimely accomplished non-stop talker can't consistently please.
J. D. Salinger
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Sometimes you get tired of riding in taxicabs the same way you get tired riding in elevators. All of a sudden, you have to walk, no matter how far or how high up.
J. D. Salinger
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My brother Allie had this left-handed fielder's mitt. he was left handed. The thing that was descriptive about it though, was that he had poems written all over the fingers and the pocket and everywhere. In green ink. He wrote them on it so that he'd have something to read when he was in the field and nobody was up to bat
J. D. Salinger
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Sleep tight, ya morons!
J. D. Salinger
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Where do the ducks go in the winter?
J. D. Salinger
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After I go out this door, I may only exist in the minds of all my acquaintances…I may be an orange peel.
J. D. Salinger
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Some people you shouldn't kid, even if they deserve it.
J. D. Salinger
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A confessional passage has probably never been written that didn't stink a little bit of the writer's pride in having given up his pride.
J. D. Salinger
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It was a very stupid thing to do, I'll admit, but I hardly didn't even know I was doing it.
J. D. Salinger
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It isn't very serious, I have this tiny little tumor on the brain.
J. D. Salinger
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Let's just try to have a marvelous time this weekend. I mean not try to analyze everything to death for once, if possible. Especially me. I love you.
J. D. Salinger