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It isn't very serious, I have this tiny little tumor on the brain.

J. D. Salinger

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J. D. Salinger
Age: 91 †
Born: 1919
Born: January 1
Died: 2010
Died: January 27
Author
Novelist
Writer
New York City
New York
Jerome David Salinger
Jerome Salinger
Tumor
Understatement
Tumors
Tiny
Serious
Brain
Littles
Little

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Where do the ducks go in the winter?
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You asked me how to get out of the finite dimensions when I feel like it. I certainly don't use logic when I do it. Logic's the first thing you have to get rid of.
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For a psychoanalyst to be any good... he'd have to believe that it was through the grace of God that he'd been inspired to study psychoanalysis in the first place.
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It's not too bad when the sun's out, but the sun only comes out when it feels like coming out.
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It was a very stupid thing to do, I'll admit, but I hardly didn't even know I was doing it.
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I was surrounded by phonies...They were coming in the goddam window.
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I mean most girls are so dumb and all. After you neck them for a while, you can really watch them losing their brains. You take a girl when she really gets passionate, she just hasn't any brains. -Holden Caulfield
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The worst thing that being an artist could do to you would be that it would make you slightly unhappy constantly.
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I'm not afraid to compete. It's just the opposite. Don't you see that? I'm afraid I will compete - that's what scares me.
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I said old Jesus probably would've puked if He could see it - all those fancy costumes and all. Sally said I was a sacrilegious atheist. I probably am. The thing Jesus really would've liked would be the guy who plays the kettle drums in the orchestra.
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There isn't anyone anywhere who isn't Seymour's Fat Lady. Don't you know that? Don't you know that goddam secret yet? And don't you know — listen to me, now — don't you know who that Fat Lady really is? . . . Ah, buddy. Ah, buddy. It's Christ Himself. Christ Himself, buddy.
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I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.
J. D. Salinger
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Each of his phrases was rather like a little ancient island, inundated by a miniature sea of whiskey.
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It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.
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She was a girl who for a ringing phone dropped exactly nothing. She looked as if her phone had been ringing continually ever since she had reached puberty.
J. D. Salinger
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Or you'd just passed by one of those puddles in the street with gasoline rainbows in them. I mean you'd be different in some way—I can't explain what I mean. And even if I could, I'm not sure I'd feel like it.
J. D. Salinger
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In every school I've gone to, all the athletic bastards stick together.
J. D. Salinger
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I don't know about bores. Maybe you shouldn't feel too sorry if you see some swell girl getting married to them. They don't hurt anybody most of them, and maybe they're all terrific whistlers or something. Who the hell knows? Not me.
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who wants flowers when youre dead? nobody.
J. D. Salinger
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There are still a few men who love desperately.
J. D. Salinger