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I'm looking to be the next comedy mogul.

J. B. Smoove

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J. B. Smoove
Age: 59
Born: 1964
Born: December 16
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Plymouth
North Carolina
Jerry Angelo Brooks
Jerry Brooks
Mogul
Moguls
Comedy
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More quotes by J. B. Smoove

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What happens in improv is you create your own storyline.
J. B. Smoove
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Comedians are therapists. People honestly think we're doing it for ourselves. No. If we wanted to do stand-up for ourselves, we would perform in front of a mirror and never go to a club. We are giving this away. Some people are going through so much in their lives, they want to hear something else that's going on in the world and laugh.
J. B. Smoove
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Live TV has an amazing pace to it. You've got to be able to think quick, make changes last minute, and be funny and fast.
J. B. Smoove
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You can't take everything that is offered to you. I pass on a lot of stuff, because I truly believe that I will shine better if I could do it 200 percent rather than do it 80 percent and make it so-so.
J. B. Smoove
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I live in New York right now but I'm originally from my daddy's nuts. We all are. Think about, we the lucky ones - we made it. You all are winners. That's the first race you ever won.
J. B. Smoove
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You gotta improvise in life. You gotta improv if the police pull you over.
J. B. Smoove
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My wife is a vegetarian. When my wife is with me, I eat vegetarian. When she's not, I eat meat. I'm just being honest.
J. B. Smoove
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There're rules to being the side chick. Rule number one: you're number two.
J. B. Smoove
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I did a club one night - the speakers were old as hell. My jokes were coming out in black and white.
J. B. Smoove
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Man, you can come see me six or seven times in a row and you'll never see the same show twice, because I don't like to be robotic onstage. I like to perform for that particular audience.
J. B. Smoove
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I just always found it easier to be the same guy onstage as you are offstage.
J. B. Smoove
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I could never live with you not 'cause I'm racist or nothing. It's just 'cause as a black man in America, I need to have someone I can come home and complain about white people to. And that just don't work with my white wife.
J. B. Smoove
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I should be European. I'm long and lean. I'd look good in a trench coat.
J. B. Smoove
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Remember Tupperware? That was the toughest stuff ever. Why can't they make a phone out of Tupperware?
J. B. Smoove
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Pursuing your dreams involves you accepting where you want to go. Don't allow anybody else to talk you out of things or discourage you from doing whatever you want to do. You can hold on to your dream and never pursue it or you can start pursuing it. If you can see it, or if you can envision it... it can happen.
J. B. Smoove
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When I started stand-up, the first thing I did was to take an improv class.
J. B. Smoove
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I talked about everything, man. I've always written material that everyone can laugh at. I talked about growing up. I did a lot of physical comedy. That was my thing. I was a physical comedian. I did anything and everything from running on a treadmill, I can paint a picture on stage of anything.
J. B. Smoove
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Believe it or not, I write on stage. I can't write anywhere else I have to be in a moment. I also have to challenge myself to make something funny out of a premise. I never have my own jokes written. I have to change things as I go along, and I have to entertain myself.
J. B. Smoove
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I was the hallway clown in high school.
J. B. Smoove
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I've done everything. Selling door-to-door fire extinguishers... In bars, I used to repair those machines that have 10 different buttons on them to spray club soda and seltzer.
J. B. Smoove