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Would you care for something to drink?” “Is it poisoned?” “It’s Saturday,” I said. “We only serve poison during the week.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
Saturday
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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Grandpa? Declan raised his eyebrows. We keep him in the shed out back, Jack said helpfully. So he doesn't eat dog brains.
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Kate leaned back against her chair. Where is the bane of my existence? In the shower, freshening up. Oh, God, who did Asciano screw now? No, no, he's covered in blood. Oh good. She sighed and stopped. The kid is covered in blood and we're relieved. There is something wrong with us.
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I had an appointment with a sexual deviant and I didn’t want to be late.
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What would I do without the moral compass of a teenage werewolf.
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There is no such thing as privacy between a deity and his worshipper. There are no secrets, no glossed-over failures. Only promises kept and abandoned, sins committed and imagined, and raw emotion. How many of us are ready to have our lives judged? What would happen if we were found wanting?
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It took a qualified wizard to detect a summoning in progress. It required only a half-literate idiot with a twitch of power and a dim idea of how to use it to attempt one. Before you knew it, a three-headed Slavonic god was wreaking havoc in downtown Atlanta, the skies were raining winged snakes, and SWAT was screaming for more ammo.
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I batted my eyelashes and did my best to appear dumb as a board
Ilona Andrews
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Kid 1: *examining my gorgeous strawberry and blueberry pies*: Wow, Mom, your pies don’t look awful this time. Me (Ilona): ... ~A little later~ Kid 2: *wandering into the kitchen* Kid 1: Hey, you’ve got to see these pies. *opening the stove* Kid 2: Wow. They are not ugly this time. Kid 1: I know, right?
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May I say that I am delighted that my favorite alpha is feeling better. Why, you'll be running recklessly into danger against overwhelming odds anytime now.
Ilona Andrews
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All men are liars. All women are liars, too.
Ilona Andrews
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Aha, Andrea said. I'm going to ignore that you just referred to yourself as 'sugar woogums'.
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One day I'll kill him, you know. I glanced at her. She was deadly serious.
Ilona Andrews
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Her imagination painted Georgie twenty years later, sitting in leg irons before some Broken psychiatrist. Well, you see, it all started with bubbles.
Ilona Andrews
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Next to me, Saiman smiled. We all want what we can't have, Kate. I want you, you want love, and he wants to break my neck.
Ilona Andrews
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I can't hate people that much. Don't get me wrong. I want to murder every last Keeper I can find. But that's not hate. That's vengeance.
Ilona Andrews
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The decorator of Las Colimas must have been a great admirer of both early Aztec and late Taco Bell architectural styles.
Ilona Andrews
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Ask a man how much a dollar is worth, and he'll tell you, 'Almost nothing.' Try to take a dollar away from him, and you'll get yourself a fight.
Ilona Andrews
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Who is there with you? Raphael Kate's voice snapped. I'll be in Atlanta in three hours. Where are you? I said it's nothing major. Bullshit. You wouldn't work with Raphael unless the Apocalypse was imminent and that was the only way to prevent it.
Ilona Andrews
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Would you like to borrow a pair of my panties to wave around at the next Council meeting to get the point across?” His eyes flashed. “Got any to spare?” I could’ve picked somebody rational. But no, I had to fall in love with this arrogant idiot. Come to the Keep with me, be my princess. Mourn me when your crazy dad kills me. Yeah, right.
Ilona Andrews
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You're an interesting woman. Your interest has been duly noted.
Ilona Andrews