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You snore worse. At least I don't turn into a lion in my sleep. I only did it once. Once was weird enough, thank you.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
Sleep
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Lion
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Weird
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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Curran and I mixed about as well as glycerin and nitric acid: put us together, shake a bit, and hit the deck as we exploded.
Ilona Andrews
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I've never seen such a collection of idiots in my whole life.' Doolittle shook his head. 'If you participate in this lunacy, y'all will get yourselves killed. Then don't come crying to me.' Now that would be a neat trick.
Ilona Andrews
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When walking into the lair of the dragon after robbing his hoard, the least you could do is hold you head high [...]
Ilona Andrews
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I make a bad mom, but I can pull off a crazy aunt.
Ilona Andrews
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Shave that jaw, brush that hair, tone down the crazy in the eyes, and he would have to fight women off with that crossbow.
Ilona Andrews
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Just stay close to us. If we get in trouble, we'll kill everything.
Ilona Andrews
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Other pirates leaped over the railing. One, two... seven... thirteen. A baker’s dozen. Wait, fifteen. Eighteen... Twenty-one. The odds weren’t in our favor. “Maybe they just came over to borrow a cup of sugar,” I said. Andrea barked a short laugh. Curran put his hand on my shoulder. “That’s a lot of sugar. Must be a big cake.
Ilona Andrews
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You said sloppy! Look, I didn't even use my sword I hit him with my head, like a moron.
Ilona Andrews
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Aunt B walked out onto the helipad wearing loose yoga pants. “I’m just here to stretch. Kate, want to help?” “Sure.” Thirty seconds later, as I was flying through the air, I decided that this wasn’t the best idea.
Ilona Andrews
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Who is that?” “Your replacement.” “You replaced me with a shaved poodle?” “He's got mad skills.
Ilona Andrews
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Curran gave me a flat look. I can always drive to a burger joint instead. Oh, so you'd throw a burger down my throat and expect making out in the back seat? He grinned. We can do it in the front seat instead, if you prefer. Or on the hood of the car. I'm not doing it on the hood of the car. Is that a dare? Why me?
Ilona Andrews
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Shapeshifter parenting motto—if your kid slit somebody's throat, always have a backup plan to make the body disappear.
Ilona Andrews
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What's with the cute shoelace on your head? What this? He flicked the end of the cord with his finger. Yeah. Rambo called, he wants his bandana back.
Ilona Andrews
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Curran is the Beast Lord. Tremble.
Ilona Andrews
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A pissy werelion was rather difficult to live with.
Ilona Andrews
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I flexed my wrist, popped a silver needle into my palm, and offered it to him. 'What's this?' 'A needle.' 'What should I do with it?' He'd walked right into it. Too easy. 'Please use it to pop your head. It's obscuring my view of the room.' - Kate & Saiman
Ilona Andrews
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Syphilis. Lots and lots of magically delicious Syphilis.
Ilona Andrews
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On a scale from one to ten, the Pack was eleven and everything else a one.
Ilona Andrews
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If the sky could dream, it would dream of dragons.
Ilona Andrews
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What would I do without the moral compass of a teenage werewolf.
Ilona Andrews