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Had records so stellar, they had to lock their resumes in a drawer at night, so the golden light streaming from the pages wouldn't keep them awake.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
Night
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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Is there any chance you'd overthrow the tyrannical Beast Lord and his psychotic consort? Yeah, I want a vacation. -Kate & Curran to Jim
Ilona Andrews
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Yes I can,” Curran snarled. “Listen: this is me telling you what you will not do.” I raised the cookbook and tapped him on the nose. Bad cat.
Ilona Andrews
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An evil spark flared in his eyes. Trade: raccoon for some answers.
Ilona Andrews
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I chuckled to myself and kept walking. The Universe had proven Curran wrong: a person who aggravated him more than me did, in fact, exist.
Ilona Andrews
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What do you mean fainted? Took a dive, kissed the pavement. Swooned like a southern belle after her first kiss. Had a dreadful case of the vapors.
Ilona Andrews
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I'm counting to ten in my head. Is it helping? No. It doesn't help me with you either. I used to life weights to alleviate frustration, but someone blowtorched my weight bench. How did you do it, by the way? I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you.
Ilona Andrews
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What kind of woman greets the Beast Lord with 'here, kitty, kitty'?
Ilona Andrews
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You’re the most experienced investigator I’ve got who’s not tied up in something, and I can’t ask the Consort to look look into it, because A) she and Curran are working on something else and B) when the Consort gets involved, half of the world blows up.
Ilona Andrews
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I've never created a riot before. I did cause a brawl at the last formal. A large number of young women there actually arrived with the expectation of seducing me into matrimony, and a couple of their mothers came to blows. It was hilari—I mean, dreadful. Simply dreadful.
Ilona Andrews
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Wiggles hissed as I crossed the floor toward the throne. She fixed me with her empty hateful eyes and smelled the air, her long tongue shivering through the slit of the lipless mouth. Nice to see you too, sweetheart. Remember my cattle prod?
Ilona Andrews
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Andrea raised her hand. “This is the hand that slapped Aunt B.” “Maybe you should have it gold-plated.” “Here, you can touch it, since you’re my best friend.
Ilona Andrews
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I could have fixed almost everything else, but death defeated me every time.
Ilona Andrews
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What is wrong with you? Many, many things.
Ilona Andrews
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The human body is an amazing organism. It can go from dead tired to completely alert in a terrified blink.
Ilona Andrews
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Some women waited for a night in shining armor. She, apparently, had ended up with a knight in black jeans and leather, who wanted to chase her down and have his evil way with her.
Ilona Andrews
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The decorator of Las Colimas must have been a great admirer of both early Aztec and late Taco Bell architectural styles.
Ilona Andrews
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Only poor people are weird. Rich people are eccentric.
Ilona Andrews
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I don't trust tragedies much. It's easy to make a person sad by showing him something tragic. We all recognize when sad things happen: someone dies, someone loses a loved one, young love is crushed. It's much harder to make a man laugh-what's funny to one person isn't funny to another.
Ilona Andrews
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You said sloppy! Look, I didn't even use my sword I hit him with my head, like a moron.
Ilona Andrews
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How was I supposed to know that you let two little bears hurt you, Goldilocks? Ah, yes, that mouth. I missed it. All mine now.
Ilona Andrews