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Secret to what? Secret to shutting you up, he said. I just have to beat you till you're half-dead, then give you chicken soup and--he raised his hands--blessed silence.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
Hands
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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Now Julie could stay here, in the Keep full of homicidal maniacs who grew teeth the size of switchblades and erupted into a violent frenzy when threatened.
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If the sky could dream, it would dream of dragons.
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Your ability to remain alive never ceases to amaze me.
Ilona Andrews
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So. You refuse my money, you serve me thirty-year-old Highland Park scotch, and we've been in the same room for approximately five minutes, yet none of my bones are broken. This leads me to believe that your back is against the wall and you desperately need me for something. I'm dying to know what that is.
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The Oracle rose. As one, the three witches bowed. See? Bran jerked his thumb at the three women. That's how a woman should treat a man. Next time you see me, I want you to do just like them.
Ilona Andrews
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The dark scary servant of all evil was on his way to rescue me. Somehow that thought failed to make me warm and fuzzy.
Ilona Andrews
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One day, she’d find a way to live her life to the fullest. She was sure of it. She just had no idea how she would manage it.
Ilona Andrews
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Aunt B walked out onto the helipad wearing loose yoga pants. “I’m just here to stretch. Kate, want to help?” “Sure.” Thirty seconds later, as I was flying through the air, I decided that this wasn’t the best idea.
Ilona Andrews
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Tiny gold sparks flared in his irises. You're in my rooms in my bathtub naked and you're still mouthing off. Did he expect anything different? Hey, I didn't kick or punch you in the throat. I consider this progress. And you haven't choked me again, which is some sort of record for you.
Ilona Andrews
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Nobody ever died of being shot by a cookie.
Ilona Andrews
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One day I'll kill him, you know. I glanced at her. She was deadly serious.
Ilona Andrews
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I turned and bumped by head against his chest a few times. It was the nearest hard surface.
Ilona Andrews
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Our standard rate. A doubloon a day. It was generous. More than generous--some families would put him up for a week for a single coin. Half a doubloon a day, she said. No, you see, the idea behind bargaining is that you ask for a larger amount.
Ilona Andrews
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The good doctor put a spoon of tea into my honey. You're drinking tea a honey badger made, Jim said. What did you expect?
Ilona Andrews
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Cute. I think I would prefer to be stabbed in the eye rather than be called cute.
Ilona Andrews
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Men and swords. My father said that if you put any able-bodied man, no matter how peaceful, into a room with a sword and a practice dummy and leave him alone, eventually the man would pick up the sword and try to stab the dummy. It is human nature.
Ilona Andrews
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Do you have spies in Clan Heavy?” “I have spies everywhere.” I looked at Andrea, who was hoarding bacon on her plate. “She had tea with Mahon’s wife.” Andrea said. Aunt B looked at her. “You and I need to work on your air of mystery.
Ilona Andrews
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…Something isn’t right with you and this property. Strange things happen around it. I don’t know what is going on, but I will find out. You could make it easier on yourself by coming clean.” “Sure. This is a magic bed-and-breakfast and the two guys in my kitchen are aliens from outerspace.
Ilona Andrews
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Vampires smiled for many reasons, but when a vampire male smiled at you from this distance with that kind of look in his eyes it was done for one purpose only: to impress. Look at my big teeth. I’m an apex predator. My genetic material is awesome.
Ilona Andrews
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The kind of eyes that jumped from a woman's dreams right into her morning and made trouble in the marriage bed.
Ilona Andrews