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I just had to stay cool. Zen. No punching in the face. Punching would not be Zen.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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So. You refuse my money, you serve me thirty-year-old Highland Park scotch, and we've been in the same room for approximately five minutes, yet none of my bones are broken. This leads me to believe that your back is against the wall and you desperately need me for something. I'm dying to know what that is.
Ilona Andrews
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An evil spark flared in his eyes. Trade: raccoon for some answers.
Ilona Andrews
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Shapeshifter parenting motto—if your kid slit somebody's throat, always have a backup plan to make the body disappear.
Ilona Andrews
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I finally realized the source of your mutual attraction, Saiman said, his voice dry. You both think violence is foreplay.
Ilona Andrews
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I have a vamp body for you, Andrea said. It's in the freezer. I gave her a nice smile. You shouldn't have.
Ilona Andrews
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I make a bad mom, but I can pull off a crazy aunt.
Ilona Andrews
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Aha! So I’m not crazy.” “You are most definitely crazy,” Derek said. “But in a deranged, endearing way.
Ilona Andrews
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I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus. Saiman said dryly. Thank you for reminding me. Always happy to oblige.
Ilona Andrews
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How was I supposed to know that you let two little bears hurt you, Goldilocks? Ah, yes, that mouth. I missed it. All mine now.
Ilona Andrews
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« Barabas pulled Christopher out of the cage. The man stared up at him. “I died, didn’t I? Are you an angel?” “Sure,” Barabas said. “Follow me to the Heavenly Shower »
Ilona Andrews
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Grandpa? Declan raised his eyebrows. We keep him in the shed out back, Jack said helpfully. So he doesn't eat dog brains.
Ilona Andrews
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There is no such thing as privacy between a deity and his worshipper. There are no secrets, no glossed-over failures. Only promises kept and abandoned, sins committed and imagined, and raw emotion. How many of us are ready to have our lives judged? What would happen if we were found wanting?
Ilona Andrews
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Now climb, young grasshopper, so your Kung Fu won't be weak.
Ilona Andrews
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I'm secure enough in myself to wear panties with bows on them. Besides, they are comfy and soft. I bet. He almost purred. I gulped.
Ilona Andrews
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Vampires smiled for many reasons, but when a vampire male smiled at you from this distance with that kind of look in his eyes it was done for one purpose only: to impress. Look at my big teeth. I’m an apex predator. My genetic material is awesome.
Ilona Andrews
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I looked at the canine companion. “Me cookies. You stay.
Ilona Andrews
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He kissed me, and I pulled my personal psycho into bed with me.
Ilona Andrews
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And I meant to tell you: that was a one-in-a-thousand shot. She raised her hand. Don't. It was awesome, George confirmed. It really was, Jack said. His head exploded.
Ilona Andrews
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When I'm with him, I can feel myself getting better. It's like he's picking up broken pieces of me and putting me back together, and I don't even know he's doing it. We never talk about it. We don't go to therapy. He just loves me and that's enough.
Ilona Andrews
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I flexed my wrist, popped a silver needle into my palm, and offered it to him. 'What's this?' 'A needle.' 'What should I do with it?' He'd walked right into it. Too easy. 'Please use it to pop your head. It's obscuring my view of the room.' - Kate & Saiman
Ilona Andrews