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Just so you know: if a rakshasa shows up, I left my sword in the car.

Ilona Andrews

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Ilona Andrews
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More quotes by Ilona Andrews

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Had he expected me to hump her leg?
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Would you care for something to drink?” “Is it poisoned?” “It’s Saturday,” I said. “We only serve poison during the week.
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I had forgotten that talking to you is like trying to pet a cactus. Saiman said dryly. Thank you for reminding me. Always happy to oblige.
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On your best day, you're only as good as I am on my worst with one arm tied behind my back.
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Nobody ever died of being shot by a cookie.
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Aunt B walked out onto the helipad wearing loose yoga pants. “I’m just here to stretch. Kate, want to help?” “Sure.” Thirty seconds later, as I was flying through the air, I decided that this wasn’t the best idea.
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I batted my eyelashes and did my best to appear dumb as a board
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I’d give him a cup of coffee and a big helping of a knuckle sandwich. Generosity was a virtue and I was in the mood to be extremely virtuous.
Ilona Andrews
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How is it that I could run into a gunfight against overwhelming odds and put myself between bullets and civilians, but I couldn't scrape together enough courage to speak to the one person who mattered the most to me?
Ilona Andrews
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Men and swords. My father said that if you put any able-bodied man, no matter how peaceful, into a room with a sword and a practice dummy and leave him alone, eventually the man would pick up the sword and try to stab the dummy. It is human nature.
Ilona Andrews
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I sighed and put Slayer between the front seats. Stay here. Guard the car. Saiman shut the door. Is the sword sentient? No. But I like to pretend it is.
Ilona Andrews
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Next to me, Saiman smiled. We all want what we can't have, Kate. I want you, you want love, and he wants to break my neck.
Ilona Andrews
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You're screening your calls? Why not? It saves me from conversations with idiots. Is that an insult? His voice dropped into a deep growl. You're not an idiot, I told him. You're just a deadly psychopath with a god complex.(...)
Ilona Andrews
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I would not leave you. I'll be there. Wherever you want 'there' to be.
Ilona Andrews
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True strength isn’t in killing—or ignoring—your opponent, it’s in having the will to shield those who need your protection.
Ilona Andrews
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Who is Hunter Becker? Becker the Gory? Lighthouse Keepers? Boston? I would've preferred Becker the Easiley Surrendering or Becker the Quite Reasonable, but beyond that his name tells me nothing.
Ilona Andrews
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Let’s talk.” I pinned Red to his chair with my stare. I did deranged quite well, when the occasion required.
Ilona Andrews
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When walking into the lair of the dragon after robbing his hoard, the least you could do is hold you head high [...]
Ilona Andrews
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Did I hurt you in the parking lot? No, m'lady. I fell, so I could put a tracker on your car. Great.
Ilona Andrews
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…Something isn’t right with you and this property. Strange things happen around it. I don’t know what is going on, but I will find out. You could make it easier on yourself by coming clean.” “Sure. This is a magic bed-and-breakfast and the two guys in my kitchen are aliens from outerspace.
Ilona Andrews