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Be Hard on the issue, Soft on the person.

Henry Cloud

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Henry Cloud
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: March 17
Preacher
Psychologist
Vicksburg
Mississippi
Soft
Issue
Issues
Persons
Person
Hard

More quotes by Henry Cloud

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The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.
Henry Cloud
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You have to be able to face losing some things you might want in order to be free to do the right thing.
Henry Cloud
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Independence is not an option for us. Remember, God existed without us.
Henry Cloud
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For someone's character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.
Henry Cloud
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Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen.
Henry Cloud
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In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.
Henry Cloud
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Boundaries are basically about providing structure, and structure is essential in building anything that thrives.
Henry Cloud
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True intimacy is only build around the freedom to disagree.
Henry Cloud
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Encourage literally came from in courage. The courage is put into you from outside. Our character and abilities grow through internalizing from others what we do not possess in ourselves.
Henry Cloud
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Some goals are not going to fulfill you. Choose goals that you value and care about.
Henry Cloud
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Love can only exist where freedom and responsibility are operating.
Henry Cloud
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There's no better way to become a disintegrated character than to be your own authority.
Henry Cloud
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Marriage is not slavery. It is based on a love relationship deeply rooted in freedom. Each partner is free from the other and therefore free to love the other. Where there is control, or perception of control, there is not love. Love only exists where there is freedom.
Henry Cloud
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It is true that you get what you tolerate.
Henry Cloud
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If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you 'do' boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.
Henry Cloud
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A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word 'no.' Love respects 'no,' control does not.
Henry Cloud
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We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.
Henry Cloud
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If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.
Henry Cloud
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It’s scary to realize that the only thing holding our friends to us isn’t our performance, or our lovability, or their guilt, or their obligation. The only thing that will keep them calling, spending time with us, and putting up with us is love. And that’s the one thing we can’t control.
Henry Cloud
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Oftentimes, churches are started by an entrepreneurial church plant visionary whom everybody follows, but he's not following anybody. Even though he's accountable to a board, he's really not. Authority's a good thing, and if it's not forced upon you as a leader, then I suggest, strongly, that you go buy some.
Henry Cloud