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If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you 'do' boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.

Henry Cloud

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Henry Cloud
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: March 17
Preacher
Psychologist
Vicksburg
Mississippi
Training
Boundary
Parent
Wasting
Words
Parenting
Reality
Consists
Kids
Boundaries
Part
Breath
Remember
Breaths
Internalize
Make
Experiences
Digest

More quotes by Henry Cloud

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Encourage literally came from in courage. The courage is put into you from outside. Our character and abilities grow through internalizing from others what we do not possess in ourselves.
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The sad thing is that many of us come to Christ because we are sinners, and then spend the rest of our lives trying to pretend that we are not!
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If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.
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People tend to look at dating sort of like a safari - like they're trying to land the trophy.
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If you continue to blame other people for “making” you feel guilty, they still have power over you, and you are saying that you will only feel good when they stop doing that. You are giving them control over your life. Stop blaming other people.
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Independence is not an option for us. Remember, God existed without us.
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For someone's character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.
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Dating is a place to practice how to relate to other people.
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It’s scary to realize that the only thing holding our friends to us isn’t our performance, or our lovability, or their guilt, or their obligation. The only thing that will keep them calling, spending time with us, and putting up with us is love. And that’s the one thing we can’t control.
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The physicality of a real relationship - one that encompasses mind, body and soul - ultimately makes it more fulfilling and powerful than any virtual relationship ever could be.
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Marriage is not slavery. It is based on a love relationship deeply rooted in freedom. Each partner is free from the other and therefore free to love the other. Where there is control, or perception of control, there is not love. Love only exists where there is freedom.
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Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.
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A leader's responsibility is to cause a vision and mission to have tangible results in the real world.
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Training moments occur when both parents and children do their jobs. The parent's job is to make the rule. The child's job is to break the rule. The parent then corrects and disciplines. The child breaks the rule again, and the parent manages the consequences and empathy that then turn the rule into reality and internal structure for the child.
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When a person travels through a few years with an organization, or with a partnership, or any other kind of working association, he leaves a 'wake' behind in these two areas, task and relationship: what did he accomplish and how did he deal with people?
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Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
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Be Hard on the issue, Soft on the person.
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In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.
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To get greater than 100% return on a growth step, give up defensiveness. Defensiveness stifles performance, and destroys relationships.
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A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word 'no.' Love respects 'no,' control does not.
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