Quote

I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Beat
Beats
Walk
Walks
Tell
Propeller
Right
Vegas
Gambling
Airplane

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
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I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
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The more I think of you, the less I think of you.
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I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
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My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
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A tough guy told me, I'll bet you $10 you're dead. I was afraid to bet him.
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When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
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I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
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A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday.
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
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I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
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I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
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I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.
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If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
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My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
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He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
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I have a car that I call Flattery because it gets me nowhere.
Henny Youngman