Quote

Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Neat
Puts
Clock
Paper
Law
Mother
Cuckoo
Cuckoos

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What is a home without children? Quiet.
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I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
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My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
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I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
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A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
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I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
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Let's get up here before we get killed!
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My wife has a black belt in shopping.
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I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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