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I don't believe in reincarnation, but what were you when you were alive?

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Reincarnation
Alive
Believe

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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
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I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
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When I go to a restaurant I always ask the manager, Give me a table near a waiter.
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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
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I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
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What is a home without children? Quiet.
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I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
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If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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A tough guy told me, I'll bet you $10 you're dead. I was afraid to bet him.
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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I'd commit suicide, if I could do it without killing myself.
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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
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Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.
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