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A motel is where you give up good dollars for bad quarters.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Motel
Motels
Quarters
Dollars
Give
Giving
Good

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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
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The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!
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Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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Most girls are attracted to the simple things in life. Like men.
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I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, There is water in the carburetor. I said, Where's the car? She said, In the lake.
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A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
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Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
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I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
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I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
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