Quote

I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Comedy
Forget
Funny
Words
Firsts
First
Peanuts
Never
Popcorn
Theatre

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
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Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
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My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.
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A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday.
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My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
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Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
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Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
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My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.
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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman