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He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Comic
Wasn
Comedy
Funny
Might
Defect
Fatal
Defects
More quotes by Henny Youngman
Nurse: Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office. Doctor: Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in.
Henny Youngman
I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
Henny Youngman
Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!
Henny Youngman
I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
Henny Youngman
I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
Henny Youngman
A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
Henny Youngman
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman
I don't believe in reincarnation, but what were you when you were alive?
Henny Youngman
There were three kids in my family. One of each sex.
Henny Youngman
That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
Henny Youngman
My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'
Henny Youngman
If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
Henny Youngman
He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
Henny Youngman
The more I think of you, the less I think of you.
Henny Youngman
Are you married? What do you do for agravation?
Henny Youngman
I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
Henny Youngman
The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
Henny Youngman
I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
Henny Youngman
My wife has a black belt in shopping.
Henny Youngman
This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Henny Youngman