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He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Comedy
Funny
Might
Defect
Fatal
Defects
Comic
Wasn

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?
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I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
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A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
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My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
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If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
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I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
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Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.
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If I had blood, I'd blush.
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My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, Where are you going? My wife said, I must be late, everyone is all coming back!
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College: A fountain of knowledge where all go to drink.
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I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
Henny Youngman
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
Henny Youngman
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
Henny Youngman
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A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday.
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I know what I'm giving up for Lent: my New Year's resolutions.
Henny Youngman
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I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow.
Henny Youngman
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Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?
Henny Youngman