Quote

I know a man in Ft. Worth with 100,000 head of cattle. No bodies, just heads.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Bodies
Worth
Humor
Head
Funny
Body
Men
Cattle
Heads

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Payday at my house is like the Academy Awards. My wife says: May I have the envelope please.
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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
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A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, Doc, how do I stand? The doctor says, That's what puzzles me!
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
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Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
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I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
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He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
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I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
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A woman was taking a shower. There is a knock on the door. Who is it? Blind man! The woman opens the door. Where do you want these blinds, lady?
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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
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