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My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, Crick.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Humor
Funny
Family
Crick
Japanese
Bought
Cameras
Brother

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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Nurse: Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office. Doctor: Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in.
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A motel is where you give up good dollars for bad quarters.
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I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill.
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My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
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Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
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Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket.
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Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
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Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears. Don't answer!
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She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, Tut, Tut!
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Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.
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I'd commit suicide, if I could do it without killing myself.
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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? I was ironing, and the phone rang! What about the other ear? Had to call the doctor!
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.
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My wife has a black belt in shopping.
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
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I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
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Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
Henny Youngman