Quote

My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.

Henny Youngman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Time
Hotel
Spent
Humor
Went
Wife
Bathroom
Funny
Stayed
Night
Wedding
Back
Cried

More quotes by Henny Youngman

Image
I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?
Henny Youngman
Image
We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
Henny Youngman
Image
If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
Henny Youngman
Image
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
Henny Youngman
Image
The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
Henny Youngman
Image
I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
Henny Youngman
Image
Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
Henny Youngman
Image
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Henny Youngman
Image
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Henny Youngman
Image
The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
Henny Youngman
Image
I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
Henny Youngman
Image
I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
Henny Youngman
Image
My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.
Henny Youngman
Image
This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Henny Youngman
Image
My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
Henny Youngman
Image
Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.
Henny Youngman
Image
The other day I broke 70. That's a lot of clubs.
Henny Youngman
Image
I know a man in Ft. Worth with 100,000 head of cattle. No bodies, just heads.
Henny Youngman
Image
Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it.
Henny Youngman
Image
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
Henny Youngman