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My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, Where are you going? My wife said, I must be late, everyone is all coming back!
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Way
Coming
Cop
Wife
Pulled
Wrong
Drives
Funny
Street
Everyone
Asked
Back
Streets
Must
Late
Going
Humor
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College: A fountain of knowledge where all go to drink.
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A Polish man had his vasectomy done at Sears. Now when he makes love, the garage door goes up.
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You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.
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I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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Two Polish men at Halloween with burned faces. What happened? They were bobbing for french fries.
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I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. Peanuts. Popcorn.
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