Quote

A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Car
Took
Humor
Wife
Guy
Polish
Hours
Locked
Funny
Hour
Keys

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My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
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Payday at my house is like the Academy Awards. My wife says: May I have the envelope please.
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Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.
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A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, Can I park here? No says the cop. What about all these other cars? They didn't ask!
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When I go to a restaurant I always ask the manager, Give me a table near a waiter.
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My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
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What is a home without children? Quiet.
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My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
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You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.
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I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket.
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I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
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