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Two Santa Clauses on the corner. How can you tell the Polish one? The one with the Easter basket.
Henny Youngman
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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Corner
Corners
Humor
Clauses
Funny
Basket
Tell
Baskets
Two
Easter
Polish
Santa
More quotes by Henny Youngman
When I go to a restaurant I always ask the manager, Give me a table near a waiter.
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I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
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If I had blood, I'd blush.
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While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
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The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? I was ironing, and the phone rang! What about the other ear? Had to call the doctor!
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College: A fountain of knowledge where all go to drink.
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
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We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
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I've kissed so many women I can do it with my eyes closed.
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A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot!
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You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
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If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?
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I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
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How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
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A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
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