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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Fell
Humor
Funny
Slid
Italy
Bomb
Italian
Bombs

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Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears. Don't answer!
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Now, the band that inspired that great saying, Stop The Music!!
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Doctor says to a man, You're pregnant! The man says, How does a man get pregnant? The doctor says, The usual way - a little wine, a little dinner....
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That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!
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I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
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This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.
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She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, Tut, Tut!
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We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.
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What is a home without children? Quiet.
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There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.
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My horse was so late getting home, he tiptoed into the stable.
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There were three kids in my family. One of each sex.
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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
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If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
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What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
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She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, Am I too late for the garbage? No, jump in!
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The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
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The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, Mrs. Cohen, your check came back. Mrs. Cohen answered, So did my arthritis!
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College: A fountain of knowledge where all go to drink.
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Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
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