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A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!

Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
Age: 91 †
Born: 1906
Born: March 16
Died: 1998
Died: February 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Musician
Violinist
City of Liverpool
Bomb
Italian
Bombs
Fell
Humor
Funny
Slid
Italy

More quotes by Henny Youngman

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How do Polish people spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
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My brother then opened a tall man's shop in Tokyo.
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A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, Can I park here? No says the cop. What about all these other cars? They didn't ask!
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The other day I broke 70. That's a lot of clubs.
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Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer.
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Don't move! I want to forget you just the way you are.
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I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, Which way do I go? But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...
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A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says You've been brought here for drinking. The drunk says Okay, let's get started.
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I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
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If I had blood, I'd blush.
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If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?
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If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
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I told my mother-in-law my house is your house. So she sold it.
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You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.
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My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.
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I call my lawyer and say, 'Can I ask you two questions?' He says, 'What's the second question?'
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A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
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I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium.
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Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
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